Worthy Witness

Not that you’ll remember, but my name is Charlie, and I’m nearly 10 years old.  In people terms, I’m approaching my 65th year.  For the past week and a half, I’ve been running away whenever they (my family) leave the screen door open.  I’m tired of the same old treats, and they just don’t understand how boring life can be when it’s the same ole…Because of this new condition – they call it senility, bordering on Alzheimer’s disease, they’ve decided to leave me this week with my cousin OJ, a rambunctious two and a half-year old.

I love this place! they have beds at every level, plush with pillows and loaded with toys – not that I play anymore, but I do like to sleep with OJ’s Teddy.  And the treats!  Have I mentioned yet that the little woman makes her own biscuits.  Quite a difference from the health food, low cholesterol stuff I’m forced to eat at my own home.

How do you like the picture at the top?  That’s me, the handsome, white fluffy guy on the pillow.  OJ is a spoil sport.  Just because I got there first, he’s pouting at the edge.  Isn’t this couch great!  It’s leather, and they let me watch television on it.  At my house I’m banned from the couch and have a girly, decorative floor pillow.  Try snoozing on that when there’s a two-year old running around.  OJ at least has a bed that’s big enough for both of us.  It has plush sides and sits in front of the garden door.  Did I tell you earlier?  I’m on vacation for a week and loving it.

Let me tell you about OJ’s yard.  He lives on the river and has a waterfall.  There are two lounge chairs outside with thick cushions, and we each have one.  Sometimes the little woman comes out with a book.  I don’t fuss – if she wants mine, I’ll give it to her and join OJ.  If she wants his, I’ll let him share mine.  We’re pretty good that way.  The yard has some kind of electronic wiring underground.  I know because OJ wears an orange collar.  What kind of pug would wear orange if he didn’t have to?  I get hooked up to a smart red iron pole, with a classic lead, not like the rope at home.

I don’t want you to think me ungracious or anything.  I love my family and look forward to their return.  Have to run for now.  We’re taking a road trip for frozen yogurt and a genuine, half-hour walk in White’s Woods.  Don’t wake me if I’m dreaming.